I am so so sorry, Amy. The grief really is immeasurable. Violet has been gone since October 2, and the other day I started remembering something about her and burst into tears, then sobs. I will always miss her. Friends ask if I want a new cat. At some point, I think so. But right now she’s filling up my heart. My dog died — on his own (as one vet told me he would let ME know when he was ready) — a little more than a year before Violet arrived. I was so unsure of getting another pet, and I’d already met her.

Then my friends conspired for me to receive her from one of my friends who was caring for her then (and had helped rescue her). He called mid-December one evening and said he had a Christmas gift for me and was bringing it over. I just said okay, thinking maybe he was bringing me a philosophy book! (he taught philosophy) When my front door buzzed, I went and looked out the little window and there he was with a pet carrier. Violet inside, with a red Christmas ribbon around her neck. No philosophy book, for sure! He came in with another friend, set down the carrier and let her out. And she immediately took over the whole place, went right to my favorite white wicker rocking chair, and hopped in like she owned it! And she took ownership of my heart, too.

I made a small ofrenda (a shrine in the Mexican tradition of díos de los muertos, Day of the Dead) and put a picture of her, some of her toys, her food and water bowl, even a picture of my dog. Together they represent 32 years of unconditional love in my life. I finally realized that just a couple weeks ago. I’m sure Lucky did exactly the same for you. Yes, this is a very, very hard time. At first, I woke up crying every single morning, for weeks. But several times a day I pass by her ofrenda and sometimes touch her picture and one of her mouse toys. It comforts me a little. It’s something. But I now always carry around that reminder of her many years of unconditional love. Thank you writing to me, Amy. I hope reading the story again eased you even a tiny bit. You’re a good human being for offering your unconditional love to Lucky. Contact me any time you want. (I’m going to go read some of your stories now! Offering you my support.)