Erin, I read your response this morning before I left for a therapy appt. This was a real connection, I’m really glad we made. So it took you five years to be able to enter the hospital and not feel traumatized. Last August I returned to Cleveland Clinic where the transplant took place, and didn’t feel any of the trauma there. But I was treated really well there. It’s Univ. of Colorado Hospital where all of my pre-transplant care took place where I just go crazy when I walk into any of their entrances, and go to any appt. I don’t see any of my transplant center caregivers there anymore — thank goodness. I remain angry at them, and hope one day that dissipates.

I’m not so sure what I had was depression so much as that stuckness that PTSD delivers. So three therapists later, I got the right kind of care.

What’s really interesting between us is that I suffered for years with PTSD from an event and general treatment during my childhood too. I wrote a memoir (unpublished) for my thesis in graduate school which spells that out, and addressed the PTSD, too.

I too had years of talk therapy, but also some body therapy — first Rolfing (you can look that up — it was very good) and then later a very gentle, no-equipment biofeedback therapy and training on how to do it myself from my Jungian therapist. The addition of the body therapy makes a big difference. In fact, even working out (which I did also, including lifting and tons of walking) gives a mind a boost from a more engaged body. We’re all connected up, and neuroscience is learning more and more about that. I hope we stay in touch. I also have a blog I started while I was sick (https://danabeesvoice.wordpress.com) or you can write me directly at dana.bennett88@gmail.com. I live in Denver, btw. Take care, and be well.